The Dudeism Forum

40. Application of Bowling
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The motion of the Ball is smooth;
The use of the Ball is to fuck the pins in the ass;
All bowling is made of Tao,
And Tao is made of nothing.

41. Dudeism
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When the strong learn Dudeism, they practice it diligently;
When the average learn Dudeism, they practice it sometimes;
When the weak learn Dudeism, they laugh out loud;
Those who do not take it easy do not learn at all.

Therefore it is said:
Who understands the Dude seems foolish;
Who progresses in Dudeism seems to fail;
Who follows the Dude seems to wander.

So the greatest force appears to be a pushover;
The brightest pin appears colored;
The richest goldbricker appears incomplete;
The strongest Lebowski appears meek;
The most beautiful porn star appears fickle;

So the rug, perfected, has no corner;
Art, perfected, has no vagina;
Coitus, perfected, has no climax;
Form, perfected, has no style.

So the Dude can not be sensed or known:
He transmits sensation and transcends knowledge.

Halfway there dudes...

We're going to have to get some dudeist artists to come up with some Zen scenery or something  for each verse.

The Tao Dude Ching - A book of Dudeisms and what-have-you

Is this a--what day is this?

42. Harmony
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The Dude wears a robe;
The robe is worn at Ralph's;
Ralph's has the half-and-half;
Half-and-half makes a good caucasian;
All things begin with The Dude and end with a buzz,
But it is Ralph's that brings harmony.

As others teach, I teach,
"Those without a Ralph's card cannot write a check";
This is my teacher.

43. Overcoming the Impossible
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The loser overcomes the achiever;
The bum penetrates the heiress;
Therefore I value taking it easy.

Speaking without knowing
What the fuck you are talking about,
Action without work,
Are understood by no one.

44. Abidement
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Next Frame or Self: which is dearer?
Self or the fucking money: which is more valuable?
Compensation or loss: which is more painful?

Great coitus incurs great expense,
And great wealth incurs great goldbricking,
But great abidement incurs no loss.

Therefore:
He who knows when to take it easy
Does not enter into a world of pain,
And may long Abide.

There is deep breathing as the lane is approached.
I roll my ball into the tau of the pins.
Self, pins, lane and ball are revealed as one and breached.

This is not Nam.
Those are the fucking rules.
All is marked zero.

Fuck it.

I like your style digitalbuddha, we'll have to call that verse #1 in the Tao Te Bowling and What-Have-You

45. Shut the Fuck Up Donny
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Being perfectly calm seems imperfect,
But does not wave a gun around;
A reasonable allowance seems empty,
But does not mean he's fucking loaded.

The truth is it's the foundations money;
He has no real money of his own;
Father's weakness is his vanity, hence the slut.

Though yoga increases the chance of conception,
Taking it easy overcomes desire;
So shut the fuck up Donny.

46. Desire
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When the World does not abide with Tao,
Reactionaries throw the coffee mugs;
When the World abides with Tao,
Veterans stay and finish their coffee.

There is no greater undudeness than desire;
There is no greater misery than a pissed-on rug;
There is no greater ailment than greed;
But one who abides to abide
May always abide.

47. Knowledge and Experience
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Without taking off your robe
You know the whole World.
Without taking off your sunglasses
You see the color of the sky.

The more undudeness you experience,
The less dudeness you know.
The stranger wanders without knowing,
Looks without seeing,
Achieves without acting.

Quote from: DirtDude on February 23, 2009, 11:35:09 PM
I like your style digitalbuddha, we'll have to call that verse #1 in the Tao Te Bowling and What-Have-You

Thanks man, I dig your style too, got that whole dude thing going on. Totally unspoiled.

48. Knowledge
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The follower of knowledge acquires as much as he can every day;
The follower of The Dude can't be worried about that shit.

By bowling and weed he reaches a state of inaction
Wherein he does nothing, leaves nothing undone,
"Aix chaim he", Dude, as the ex used to say.

To conquer the World, take it easy;
If you must do something,
Do a J, and let the World conquer itself.

49. The Worlds of Others
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The Dude does not distinguish between Lenin and Lennon;
Therefore those who will benefit are the Walrus.

He is good to those who are a Lebowski;
He is also good to those who are a Lebowski;
For Lebowski is the name.
He trusts those who are wrong;
He also trusts those who are not wrong, but are assholes;
For love is trust.

He is in harmony with the World;
So he abides in the Worlds of others.
Mark it, Dude.