The Dudeism Forum

Someone mentioned blessing dildoes in another post.

Now, that's a service I may have to start offering to those in need in my community.

In a more mundane capacity, I led a service at a UU fellowship and gave a sermon extolling Dudeism. It would have been really cool if I'd brought along some dildoes as props...

Any other things you done?

What do you mean with "dildoes" dude?

I'll let somebody else answer her for that one.....errhmm.

I think i know what is a "Dildo", but i don't wanna say it because if i'm wrong...you know...what a shame..hahahaha.
But whatever, in the parlance of my country a "dildo" is a "plastic jhonson" a vibrator, am i wrong?

Actually dudette, "Dildo" is a disease in the US, where a man starts to grow penises all over his body and then actually becomes a giant johnson. See the pic below:




No, I am just kidding, you are absolutely correct, it is a plastic johnson (though it also may be made of rubber or glass or another material). Whatever you do tho, just don't let the dog get a hold of it.

Ha-ha-ha-ha!  Wonderful dog.  Very free-spirited.  We're all very fond of her/him.
Hahahaha..marvelous picture Turtle.

Yezz, da dog iz vun of our vittle achieverz.

He haz been trained to bite off your chonson, lebowski!!!!

And he is un ex-bert!!!!!!!!!

If I am guessing correctly, I believe that guy can satisfy about 80 women at once.
Except, he would have to have an epileptic fit to do it.

Quote from: Turtle on June 24, 2008, 07:52:45 PM
If I am guessing correctly, I believe that guy can satisfy about 80 women at once.
Except, he would have to have an epileptic fit to do it.

coincidently, he is epileptic, and carries his own strobe light

Quotecoincidently, he is epileptic, and carries his own strobe light

that must make him very popular with the ladies.... and at parties.



probably looks something like Peter Garrett (of Midnight Oil) dancing, maybe???

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0H8omYwKw2M

I'm one step away from performing a circumcision.

So close I can almost taste it.

Yummy.

What the fuck are you talking about?!

Who the fuck are you man?! The friend with a cleft asshole?!

What do you do?!

Friend of mine built a bar down in his basement, had me bless it for him. 

Quote from: Dude1967 on July 28, 2008, 02:58:45 PM
Friend of mine built a bar down in his basement, had me bless it for him. 

Far out. What did you say/do? Notes?

Quote from: SmokeytheBuddha on August 02, 2008, 07:44:14 AM

Quote from: Dude1967 on July 28, 2008, 02:58:45 PM
Friend of mine built a bar down in his basement, had me bless it for him. 

Far out. What did you say/do? Notes?

We set the bar up with some candles arranged on it, with whale songs playing in the background.  We burned a J, and then I said a few words:

Friends-
    We are here today because ------- (he didn't want his name posted) has helped to create a place, here in his home, to Abide and Relax.  at -------'s Bahama Bar.  We realize that in a world that can be, in the parlance of our times, very Un-Dude, we need to have an oasis of Calm.  -------- has provided that oasis.  May this bar be a place that through the hospitality of -------- we can enjoy an oat soda, or a caucasian, or even nossing if that's what you want.  May the Dudes and Dudettes who come here Abide here in Peace and not go Over The Line.
Wal, I lost m'train of thought here.  But--aw hell, I done innerduced this bar enough.
 
We then switched the music to Creedence, and --------- poured Caucasians and we enjoyed the rest of the evening.  Unfortunately, no photos were taken because what happens at the Bahama Bar stays at the Bahama Bar.