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I had 2 weeks away from my job and I spent it meditating, sitting on the beach and finding my inner dude. My special lady friend was with me the whole time and she's cool, she's cool. I came back to work in the best place I've been in since finding the way of the dude...but alas...the fascists that I rely on to pay me my wages have broken me down yet again. I go from Dude to Walter in no time at all. It's really hard to stay relaxed in a place where the reactionaries that plan my day pile more and more on my plate and have no concept of "will you just calm the fuck down". I guess I'm just venting here, but I need another vacation. If I didn't have young ones at home who rely on me for basic needs I would just say fuck it, but I'm not that guy, man. I set myself a 10 year goal to wait till the youngest one is on his way into the world and then I'm fucking outta here. I don't know where...but somewhere. BUT until then...I've stepped up my meditation to try and find my inner zen but it's wearing me down man. Unfortunately I can't medicate or keep my mind limber in the profession I currently reside in so that's not an option. That's a bummer...it's a bummer man.
Yeah. As I see it your meditation is a way to remove bummer thoughts from your mind.Trouble is that you gotta feed the monkey.So there's no escape.I feel you.I've found that raising the importance of something else to offset the bummer can have positive effects.Focus on making the finals. Or making the perfect white Russian. Credence tunes.Plan a perfect Utopian society or bake some weed brownies. It's wide open.Something that can offset the bummer.I still jerk off manually.
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