The Dudeism Forum

A very dude like dude...

I suggest Jesus was very dude like (not "the Jesus" of bowling fame and a passion for eight year olds), I'm talking about the dude that lived in Israel a couple of thousand years ago. You know, the dude they nailed to a fucking tree for telling everyone that it would be dude like and a good idea to be nice to other people for a change. That Jesus. He was very dude like. Here's why............................

He told the asshole "holier than thou" religious types of his day to go fuck themselves

He hung out with cool people who liked to party and did some hefty partying himself

He wore a robe (very dude like in his time)

Hung out with his own version of the Seattle Seven (the 12 fucking disciples)

Found a coin in a fucking fishes mouth to pay the rent

Didn't have a job

Fed a lot of people

And best of all (and THIS is very dude like), turned water into great fucking wine. What could be more dude like?

I was checking out some shit about JC and it seems he was more dude like than I had thought. Seems there were these uptight assholes called Pharisees who didn't dig JC's laid back dudeness. They copped a fucked up holier than thou attitude when JC and his bowling team of 12 followers came around to role a few and do some partying. They would have had the Roman's dump shit like this on JC .....................

Pharisees draw a lot of water in this town, Jesus Dude.  You don't draw shit.  We got a nice quiet beach community here, and I aim to keep it nice and quiet.  So let me make something plain.  I don't like you sucking around bothering our citizens, Jesus Dude.  I don't like your jerk-off name, I don't like your jerk-off face, I don't like your jerk- off behavior, and I don't like you, jerk-off --do I make myself clear?

JC would come back with something like 'I'm sorry, I wasn't listening....................is this, what day is this?'

How much more dude like can you get?

I agree, man. And JC didn`t really like Nihilists but he accepted them and they could see, there`s a better way. That kind of thing is really dude like, man.

Quote from: Half and Half on August 16, 2009, 04:20:58 AM
I agree, man. And JC didn`t really like Nihilists but he accepted them and they could see, there`s a better way. That kind of thing is really dude like, man.

It would seem that JC was the man for his hour. A hero...

When they nailed him to the cross, he fit right in there, just like the Dude in the toilet. Also let's not forget, dude, let's not forget that they are both fictional characters, created by the Kohains.

Digitalbuddha, as usual you are fucking right. Christianity, which now has almost disappeared from the world, just like Dudeism is a religion that doesn't really interfere with who you are but is aimed at making the best of you and your relationship with the world.
Unfortunately, beside the Gospel of Thomas, there are no written document (for now) older than the Council of Nicea, where people belonging to the estabilished power of Church and State decided what was true about Jesus and what was not. And I guess they put together something new for the occasion too. They probably sit down around a table and said: "This man has a lot of followers, let's put together all the stuff still followed by old religions and mix them up so we can have an appeal for everyone. And use this to spread our power, increase our money and keep people calm and under our influence."
Funny that a very Dude man gave birth to one of the worse religion on Earth, used to enslave and kill people all over the world, just as it is happening now with Islam.

Now it is almost impossible to know the truth about Jesus but, since we are no more illiterate people, knowing about other religions can give us a hint about what it's probably true or not. Example are given by Mitra's cult (resurrection), all religious days (were all pagans' feasts), and so on.

But I would say that this begun with the first 12 followers who were probably the first to put some legends about his life. The fish meant free food, so they were sure a lot of people arrive at gatherings. And they were probably the first to state that you needed to be ordained by them to call yourself a Christian Minister. And all the stuff about sins has probably the same origin but I don't think it was Jesus' theory. Just like Taoism you don't know how your followers will spread your word. Taoism started with a very simple book and now there are thousands. Christianity begun with a couple of rules and now everyone knows where it arrived; and in fact they changed the name in Catholicism.

It is only my opinion but I guess he had some children too, or someone thinks that Marie Magdalene wasn't his special lady? I don't think the female form made him uncomfortable, not as it makes his so-called (by themselves) followers today. He enjoyed life and was probably killed because he said to cleft assholes and power driven people "fuck yourself".

He was very cool and very dude, and he has been killed for this, just like he would be killed today probably by the same people who state to be his followers.
You know, I guess he didn't liked much paedophiles who hate the female forms and the physical act of sex.

Fucking eh, dude. Your post was insightful and an uncompromised first draft. Great post, mang

Thank you sir. Such a compliment from a wiser fella like you is greatly rewarding. 

Quote from: greatspiritmonk on August 20, 2009, 01:53:07 AM
Thank you sir. Such a compliment from a wiser fella like you is greatly rewarding. 

No problemo, man.

You said it man. JCD was one of us. Thankie.

... As the bumper sticker says, "Lord, please save me from your followers."

Rather apt.

F*****g A man.

 'I don't like you sucking around bothering our citizens, Jesus Dude.' Yes, that is the whole story in a nutshell. Some strange guy that Romans and Jews could not understand in their square world.