The Dudeism Forum

    So, since I'm just 20 and still living at home, I still have to put up with sibling rivalry. Big sister is away at college, but little sister stays glued to the desktop computer every second she can. Approach the computer and she becomes extremely territorial, all the more reason I'm thankful to have my own laptop.
   
    Like a child walking half-way into a movie, she will weasel into conversations she wasn't a part of from across the house. Also, she has a semi-decent view of the living room TV if she turns around from the monitor, so occasionally she'll watch bits and pieces of whatever is on (while simultaneously chatting on Facebook), hence loosing track of plot, asking from the other side of the house what was going on! This didn't used to be a big deal, but it's happening so frequently now that I've had to bite my tongue for fear of screaming "SHUT THE FUCK UP, DONNY!!!"
   
    I have a portable computer, but I usually leave it in my room when I opt to watch a living room flick. I can stop a conversation online, tell the person that I have to leave and be done with it. She, however, is a slave to the monitor (seriously, she's always looking over her shoulder while eating dinner to make sure nobody's messaging her...). It didn't used to bother me, but it happens so frequently now that it's driving me up the wall! I'm tired of shouting across the house to say anything to her since she won't move to talk to anybody. And if I make one little suggestion to walk away from the computer for anything, anything at all, she pitches all kinds of nasty cold remarks. She's just so angry, all the time it seems... I try to offer assistance, talk it out, do my part to help this troubled youth, but it's as if she's convinced that I'm really out to get her and not to be trusted. I'm starting to feel queasy from her bad vibes, like physically ill. I guess all I'm going to be able to do is just give her a whole lot of leave-alone. Still, I'm so fucking frustrated here, Dudes. I'm trying hard to abide, but damn...

Lead by example dude...Abide.

Luckily I have the luxury of my own room (cave) with beautiful speakers hooked up to my computer. Pink Floyd is like an auditory sedative. After listening to some of The Wall, I'm already feeling better.

Quote from: Ninjabob27 on October 09, 2011, 07:58:19 PM
Luckily I have the luxury of my own room (cave) with beautiful speakers hooked up to my computer. Pink Floyd is like an auditory sedative. After listening to some of The Wall, I'm already feeling better.

I love gettin' mellow to Pink Floyd's Wearing the Inside Out:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B201O63uqhk

All depends on the rest of your home situation man. Parents and all that. It should be them who notice the problem and deal with it rather than leave it to you to sort out, regardless of age.

Basically, all you can do is either attempt to get her off the computer by whatever means you can, get her outside once in a while instead of infront of the screen, truely saps the life from you if that's all you see all day. I've got a sister who's in a similar position, stays on the computer all day and such, rarely agressive though but when she is, damn you want to get the fuck out of dodge asap. If she gets like that, switch the thing off if she wants to or not and get her mind off it by doing other stuff or talk it out. Usually works.

Apart from that just do as cckeiser said and lead by example and abide while you have to. By all means, try and get to the bottom of it. Use some dudejitsu on her if she's being a bitch, deflect the bad and try and keep your cool when talking to her and it'll rub off on her. Shit passes eventually and she'll either get over it or you'll move out and it won't be your problem. In the meantime, fuck it (not litterally), play some tunes and find your escape however you like.

@cckeiser: thanks for the link, man. Groovy tunes. 

     To address both of you: I agree that it's best to lead by example in this case. I usually refrain from bringing my dirty undies on Facebook since so much family is there, including my sister, so if I were to post anything remotely negative about the household, my ass would be grass (and not the good kind).

    I don't think trying to keep her off the computer is right since I'm quite attached to my own laptop. I'm on my computer on a daily basis, not every single hour of every day, but I'm still on for at least an hour daily. I don't care that she's on the computer. The fact that she's glued to that screen doesn't bother me at all. What really grinds my gears is how she gets so hostile if anybody goes near it once she's off. It doesn't matter if she's away from it for 5 minutes or for 5 hours. "Oh, just because I got off, you think you can Take Over the computer?!" (this is a literal quote from her face).

    I try so hard to convince her to calm the fuck down. To just Take it Easy, like we Dudes will do. I don't shout or anything. I just sort of lean in and say "Hey, there's no reason to be so uptight about the computer. Calm down, have a cookie, and relax." This is usually enough to shut her up, then she can go brood in her room for a while. Hell, I don't freak out when a parent needs to borrow my computer! Sure I might need to delete my browsing history, but I'm not foaming at the mouth and shouting "My Precious!!!"

    Thanks for your 2 cents, Elando. Welcome to our little beach community. I hope you're able to help your sister be less bitchy as well. 

She is probably going through some hard times. growing up and all. I know of a family they have a girl that is about 13 or 14 years old and they are afraid to enter her room.

Quote from: Ninjabob27 on October 09, 2011, 07:26:12 PM
    So, since I'm just 20 and still living at home

Problem identified. It's not time for your sister to change, Dude. We can't change others. It's time for you to get your own place and make your own rules.

Quote from: Dirty Hippie on October 10, 2011, 08:27:00 AM

Quote from: Ninjabob27 on October 09, 2011, 07:26:12 PM
    So, since I'm just 20 and still living at home

Problem identified. It's not time for your sister to change, Dude. We can't change others. It's time for you to get your own place and make your own rules.

And in your own place, you can should get a rug. To tie the room together.

    Honestly, I was in an un-dudely state of mind when I scribed this fury. I actually feel a little bad about it now. I've been just abiding and giving dudely advice to her in her times of evil. Recently she's been far more mellow toward me, though she's always slightly more passive-aggressive toward anybody else. Cards are in my favor there at least.
   
    As for moving out, unless there's anybody on here willing to throw a big wad of cash my way for funding, there's no chance of me getting my own place. I'm broke, flat broke. I'm in the job hunting business right now and with the market being as bad as it is, I've got very little to show for it. This ain't me having a pity party on here or anything, it's just an unfortunate truth. I have no job and nobody will hire me. I have sent out resumes to almost every place of business within a 25 mile radius of my house. My parents and I get along fine so it's not like I'm just chomping at the bit to get out, and they have no intention of kicking me out either.