The Dudeism Forum

I've struggled with an important issue since becoming a Dudeist. White Russians are the sacramental beverage of a good Dudeist, but along with a whopping 1% of the population, I'm allergic to milk. (Casein, the protein in milk, or what-have-you.)

This means that when I'm taking it easy with some dudes at a bar or restaurant and it comes up that I'm a Dudeist Priest, the first question is "why aren't you drinking a White Russian?" This sucks because (a) talking about the shit you're allergic to is a way boring topic for everyone including me (b) I'd love to order more White Russians but most bars don't carry soy milk or soy creamer and (c) I feel like I'm missing out not being able to lift a carton of half and half to my nose and give 'er a good sniff to see if it's still good.

There have to be other Dudeists out there who struggle with this problem. How should I deal with this? Lobby for bars to carry some fucking soy milk? Accept that it's not about the White Russian, it's about taking it easy? Carry non-dairy creamer in my purse and order Black Russians, surreptitiously mixing my own beverage below the table? Or should I just be all nihilistic since, to me, half and half can never exist?

I've tried to just light some candles and have a warm bath and forget about it . . . to no avail. White Russians are just too damn delicious.

It seems like a lot of dudes get the bubble guts from White Russians.  I think The Dude would want you to do your own thing, just so long as you were taking it easy. He was a big fan of oat sodas too, which really opens up the floodgates of finding your personal WR.

Maybe they make like a soy joy cream bar, or a hard candy that can melt in there, and you could carry some of those? it wouldn't be so weird as carrying non dairy creamer. But the ordering a black russian sounds like the thing to do...I don't see what's wrong with just enjoying them at home. You don't have to order a white russian just because your're a dudeist. that might be even anti-dudeist to lock yourself down like that...i dunno.

good luck.

I remember The Dude once used non-dairy powdered creamer in his Caucasian because he didn't have any milk.  I'm not sure if the taste would quite measure up or not, but it might be worth a try.  I'm mildly lactose intolerant myself, and non-dairy creamer in my home-roasted coffee always hits the spot!

OR you could carry soy or almond milk in one of those metal hip flasks and just pour it onto a Kahlua-and-Vodka highball to instantly transform it into the real deal.  Your barmates will think you're just spicing up your drink with an extra "something" and no lengthy explanations will be necessary.  Nobody has to know there's no firewater in the flask, unless you want them to.

Happy imbibing (and abiding) dude!

at home i use almond milk these days, used to have to use soy but these new almonds milks are thicker and perfect. still calorically a bummer though.

nowhere does it state that a dude must drink white russians.........chill out and choose a beverage of your own desire..................white russians are really nice butyou just drink anything you chooses dude..........mind if i do a j?

Quote from: reverend pirate on March 26, 2011, 04:47:17 PM
nowhere does it state that a dude must drink white russians.........chill out and choose a beverage of your own desire..................white russians are really nice butyou just drink anything you chooses dude..........mind if i do a j?

agreed. i dont remember the thread, but this was discussed previously.

I believe I'll stand by my old favorite, the mojito.

i think its cool to point out a dude can even be a non-drinker, however, i would not imagine a dude at an a.a.meeting.