Turtle was a good man...............

[Turtle]

What are you dudes blathering about?

[DigitalBuddha]

What are you dudes blathering about?

Where the fuck have you been, man? Beeper went off during league play?

[Dude1967]

What are you dudes blathering about?

No, Walter!  I said I thought he kidnapped himself!  You're the one who's so fucking certain--

[DigitalBuddha]

What are you dudes blathering about?

No, Walter!  I said I thought he kidnapped himself!  You're the one who's so fucking certain--

That's right, dude. 

[SmokeytheBuddha]

What are you dudes blathering about?

My God sir, we will not abide another toe.

[Dude1967]

  Wal, I lost m'train of thought here. But--aw hell, I done innerduced turtle enough.

[DigitalBuddha]

I think Turtle's post was a God Damned fake, man.....Maybe Waldo, and Waldo's wife who was killed by nazis, kidnapped Turtle, mang.......................

WE HAVE TURTLE.  GATHER ONE MILLION DOLLARS IN UNMARKED NON-CONSECUTIVE TWENTIES.  AWAIT INSTRUCTIONS.  NO FUNNY STUFF.

[Turtle]

The nihilists would like me to tell you that they are treating me very well (aaaabulshitchooo),
....excuse me... and I am starting to understand their non-ethos as the true way (aaaabulshitchooo)
....sorry, hay fever.... They would like you to send them a million dollars to support their beliefs...in...ah....
nothing....they will spend this money to purchase a prosthetic toe and to pay off the fines acquired from traveling with a marmot, you know, wildlife...an amphibious rodent...for domestic...inside the city limits.

Oh....and they said.....no funny stuff!

PS If you cannot get the money, then please try to get a toe by 3 o'clock...with nailpolish.
If you cannot get even that, then they said they will just take what you have on you, and
they callz it even.

[DigitalBuddha]

Dudeism suspects that the culprits might be the very people who, uh, soiled Turtles rug, and is in a unique position to confirm or, uh, disconfirm that suspicion.

Mr. Dudeism is prepared to make a generous offer to you to act as courier once we get instructions for the money.

Dudeism thinks it's the Waldo-pissers, huh?

Well Dude, we just don't know.



......................Brandt will fill you in on the details.

[Dude1967]

Dudeism suspects that the culprits might be the very people who, uh, soiled Turtles rug, and is in a unique position to confirm or, uh, disconfirm that suspicion.

Mr. Dudeism is prepared to make a generous offer to you to act as courier once we get instructions for the money.

Dudeism thinks it's the Waldo-pissers, huh?

Well Dude, we just don't know.



......................Brandt will fill you in on the details.

Brandt can't fill you in on the details, or he has to pay $100

[brandt]

This is our concern ,Turtle

[DigitalBuddha]

I think Turtle needs some cash to feed the monkey, man. Ah, let me see, I think its down their somewhere....Come on, Walter, we're ending this thing cheap. Four dollars here! Almost five!

[the Knutsens]

Everything seems to be fine, as long as there is no funny stuff!

[brandt]

What I see here is  a series of victimles crimes

Turtle kidnapped himself, Dude, you said so yourself

[Dude1967]

 Oh, man.  Don't do--