Dude is cited by the police....bummer man

[Dude1967]

I could see the Oat Soda defense working.

Or show him that you're an ordained minister in the latter-day church of the dude and hope that he is a member of the religion.

or try to convert him...

[DigitalBuddha]

I could see the Oat Soda defense working.

Or show him that you're an ordained minister in the latter-day church of the dude and hope that he is a member of the religion.

or try to convert him...

To the tenants of national socialism? ...hey, at least its an ethos. Kinda undude, but an ethos none the less.

[Turtle]

I just hope the judge doesn't ask me if its my homework.

Actually....fuck that....dudes....what if the judge is a nihilist?

   

[DigitalBuddha]

I just hope the judge doesn't ask me if its my homework.

Actually....fuck that....dudes....what if the judge is a nihilist?

   

Well Turtle, we just don't know. Perhaps..................

All right, Plan B.  You might want to watch out the front window there, Judge.

This is what happens when you FUCK a STRANGER in the ASS, Judge.

YOU SEE WHAT HAPPENS, JUDGE!

YOU SEE WHAT HAPPENS?!

THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU FUCK A STRANGER IN THE ASS!

HERE'S WHAT HAPPENS, JUDGE!

HERE'S WHAT HAPPENS!  WHEN YOU FUCK A STRANGER IN THE ASS!


...................we are sympathizing here, Turtle.

[Turtle]

Fuck sympathy, I need my johnson.

[Dude1967]

Fuck sympathy, I need my johnson.

What do you need that for, Dude?

[DigitalBuddha]

Fuck sympathy, I need my johnson.

You gotta buck up, man, you can't go into the court with this negative attitude--

[Turtle]

Fuck the court and fuck you Walter.

[Turtle]

By the way, does anybody know anything about this kinda shit?
I was thinking I should take some character reference letters into court
with me from some people I know, does the Judge accept that?

Also, would any of you Dudes like to right a character reference for me?

[DigitalBuddha]

Fuck the court and fuck you Walter.

Fuck the judge? Okay Dude.  I can see you don't want to be cheered up.  C'mon Donny, let's go get a lane.

[Turtle]

Friends like these Gary.

[Turtle]

So I had court today.
There was a bunch of us there for the open bottle charge.
It seems there's a new fascist in town, a cop who just shipped in
from the mainland and is tryin to make a name for himself.
The worst of all was this little 80 year old japanese man
and his cute little wife, I cannot believe this fascist cop
actually cited this poor little old man for having an open
container, what a dick! The poor little guy hobbled up in
front of the judge, and when the judge asked his age and
the old man said 80, I was like, damn, this fucking fascist, this
cop, this fucking pig, what a prick!!
Even the judge, after hearing this cop's name over and over
again, you could see in his face, he was like....ugh....somebody's gotta
do something about this guy.
Anyway, they gave us all 2 choices:
1 - plead guilty or no contest and accept an $80 fine.
2 - plead not guilty and come back again for a trial
I might have been able to get the charge dismissed if i pleaded not guilty
and came back, but i wanted to get it over with and everybody was taking the deal.
so i told them, ok, no contest, i'm just gonna go find a cash machine.
Fucking looters, fucking fascists, $80 is dinner for a whole week.
And lets not forget, lets not forget, the Turtle is a criminal now dudes,
an oat soda drinker....with a record.

[Andrea D.]

Fucking fascist man.

[DigitalBuddha]

So I had court today.
There was a bunch of us there for the open bottle charge.
It seems there's a new fascist in town, a cop who just shipped in
from the mainland and is tryin to make a name for himself.
The worst of all was this little 80 year old japanese man
and his cute little wife, I cannot believe this fascist cop
actually cited this poor little old man for having an open
container, what a dick! The poor little guy hobbled up in
front of the judge, and when the judge asked his age and
the old man said 80, I was like, damn, this fucking fascist, this
cop, this fucking pig, what a prick!!
Even the judge, after hearing this cop's name over and over
again, you could see in his face, he was like....ugh....somebody's gotta
do something about this guy.
Anyway, they gave us all 2 choices:
1 - plead guilty or no contest and accept an $80 fine.
2 - plead not guilty and come back again for a trial
I might have been able to get the charge dismissed if i pleaded not guilty
and came back, but i wanted to get it over with and everybody was taking the deal.
so i told them, ok, no contest, i'm just gonna go find a cash machine.
Fucking looters, fucking fascists, $80 is dinner for a whole week.
And lets not forget, lets not forget, the Turtle is a criminal now dudes,
an oat soda drinker....with a record.

Well dude, we just don't know. Fighting the reactionary fucking undude cop might have been the way to go, but at least the god damned plane didn't crash into the mountain and the judge toss you into the can, man. You know your rights, man. Either way, the court shit is over.

Here is a hint...in most states, if you don't fuck up and get busted again, you can request that your record be expunged of the conviction (which I presume was a misdemeanor). You go down to the court and request the paperwork, pay a buck or two, file the paper work (i.e., you serve the prosecutor's office with the paperwork and it will then come before the judge. If you have been a clean dude for the duration of your probation (or a bit longer in some states), the conviction will be ordered by the court expunged. having it expunged will mean that it is more or less like it didn't happen, and the record of such will no longer be public. It is NOT a reversal of the conviction, only a cleaning of your record.

See - http://www.thelaw.com/forums/archive/index.php/t-1534.html

And - http://www.expunge-criminal-records.com/reducing-felony-to-misdmeanor.html



A fucking 80 year old dude...that's like fucked up totally! jesus!

And, T-dude, "old japanese man" is not the preferred nomenclature; Asian American, please.

[brandt]

The "old japanese man" is not the issue here, it's unchecked aggression perpetrated by a little dick, donut eatin, masculinity threatened, bull necked, smacked ass, embarrassing representative of the "law" In other words someone who couldn't compete on a level playing field! coward! bum! I suggest he "get
a real job!"

Man, this affects us all.

Find a family restaurant and enjoy your coffee, or oat soda.

It's Brandt, at , uh well, Mr. Lebowski, and I can assure you we ARE pissed about this waste of taxpayers money and this travesty of alleged law enforcement!

SHOMER FUCKIN' SHABBAS!