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Author Topic: 30-year-old evicted from parents' home  (Read 4840 times)

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BikerDude

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Re: 30-year-old evicted from parents' home
« Reply #15 on: September 05, 2018, 07:22:28 AM »
Don't do differentiation of ranks, not superior, not inferior. The oak is not better than the acorn.

Who owns the house?
Rank is inevitable. It's where he rubber meets the road.
Thank God.
He's an adult. His parents can kick his deadbeat ass out if they so choose.
Same as if he was a stranger in the Alps.
Most hierarchies are the very embodiment of justice.
Which ideally is an expression of competence which no matter how unsavory we find it equates to value.

Out here we are all his children

EsmagaSapos

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Re: 30-year-old evicted from parents' home
« Reply #16 on: September 06, 2018, 05:35:33 AM »
Hey man, I wasn't saying about that guy over there, was about the last guy who replied about him being a giant creep or something like it.
Who owns the house?
That depends on the perspective of owning, but in this game, his parents.
Rank is inevitable. It's where he rubber meets the road.
The rubber implies the road, without any road the rubber wouldn't have something to be stepping in, by that the rubber shouldn't think his better or worse, they depend on which other, same way with individuals.
He's an adult. His parents can kick his deadbeat ass out if they so choose.
Calling him a deadbeat is saying he should play this game, that he should belong to something, I'm not saying it's wrong, I'm saying he shouldn't play this game if he doesn't want to.
Most hierarchies are the very embodiment of justice.
How do we make a decision? Where does it comes from? Comes from the act of choose, and choosing is the hesitation before making a decision, is the dough of it be a right or wrong decision, but we never know if it's right or wrong, we never have all the data to consider, because data is infinity. The same thing with justice, to make justice we can't avoid the use of consciousness, and consciousness isn't a separate entity, we think it is because is based on memories and images, on numbers, symbols and words and they are all given to us by our society.  We are one with the everything in the nothingness, that is a realization. If we try to be brave if because we are scared, if we try not to have pain is because we are in pain, if we try to feel superior is because we think we are inferior and so on and on.

Which ideally is an expression of competence which no matter how unsavory we find it equates to value.
Value and competence on and for what?


« Last Edit: September 06, 2018, 05:54:12 AM by EsmagaSapos »

BikerDude

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Re: 30-year-old evicted from parents' home
« Reply #17 on: September 06, 2018, 06:23:51 AM »
Hey man, I wasn't saying about that guy over there, was about the last guy who replied about him being a giant creep or something like it.
Who owns the house?
That depends on the perspective of owning, but in this game, his parents.
Rank is inevitable. It's where he rubber meets the road.
The rubber implies the road, without any road the rubber wouldn't have something to be stepping in, by that the rubber shouldn't think his better or worse, they depend on which other, same way with individuals.
He's an adult. His parents can kick his deadbeat ass out if they so choose.
Calling him a deadbeat is saying he should play this game, that he should belong to something, I'm not saying it's wrong, I'm saying he shouldn't play this game if he doesn't want to.
Most hierarchies are the very embodiment of justice.
How do we make a decision? Where does it comes from? Comes from the act of choose, and choosing is the hesitation before making a decision, is the dough of it be a right or wrong decision, but we never know if it's right or wrong, we never have all the data to consider, because data is infinity. The same thing with justice, to make justice we can't avoid the use of consciousness, and consciousness isn't a separate entity, we think it is because is based on memories and images, on numbers, symbols and words and they are all given to us by our society.  We are one with the everything in the nothingness, that is a realization. If we try to be brave if because we are scared, if we try not to have pain is because we are in pain, if we try to feel superior is because we think we are inferior and so on and on.

Which ideally is an expression of competence which no matter how unsavory we find it equates to value.
Value and competence on and for what?


Outcome matters.
Actual value.
Reality.
They own the house.
He is over 30.
They get to say "we have done our duty. We wash our hands of him".

A Hierarchy is the culmination of many many many opinions.
Not some overarching authority. Or in any practical sense "opinion".
Value is what people deem valuable. As a society.
It can be translated into something else of value.
A single person might say that a rock is valuable.
But unless the world agrees he can't buy food with it.
A single opinion is a fart in the wind.
As far as Justice, it is the culmination of a multitude of opinions.
We build that very idea into the best systems that we can devise to ensure it.
This is the core of humanity.
Hierarchy is as close as we get to social justice.
Is it corruptible? Of course.
But support for anything else is just a veiled attempt to justify some sort of Totalitarian reality.
Generally using "kindness" or "justice" as an excuse for controlling what others think and say.
It's all the rage these days.
A million little self proclaimed geniuses who can't earn a basic living but who are authorities on how to change the world.
The Bums Lost! They will always lose!

 

Out here we are all his children

EsmagaSapos

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Re: 30-year-old evicted from parents' home
« Reply #18 on: September 06, 2018, 08:16:06 AM »
There would be a time were I would totally agree with you.

With my search for Taoism I fond Alan Watts that completely changed my view.

Before Alan the only thing that ever bothered, questioned me was the nucleus of everything, everything was superficial.

I did introspective thinking, philosophy searching, psychoanalyses, had empathy trying to understand the other side.

But the question and dough was always there, what is the nucleus, what is the point of living and dying?

In my opinion was to leave a legacy, to leave a good memory on others, but what then?

Alan Watts didn't change my life, he give me a life, before him I was a corpse without any particular reason or meaning.

Alan Watts is a teacher of Zen, which is 90% Taoism, which is the basic structure of Dudeism.

By that I don't think you should think differently just because you see trued in Dudeism, I'm saying the exact opposite.

You shouldn't take anything seriously, the point of the dance is the dance.

I believe that until you realize that you are the everything, there are not separate entities, you will live in fear.

All this questions, opinions, perspectives are absolutely nothing, and eventually you'll realize the nucleus behind all of them.

I'm not trying to change your 'self', I'm trying to show you a blip of what is my trued.
« Last Edit: September 06, 2018, 08:18:55 AM by EsmagaSapos »

BikerDude

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Re: 30-year-old evicted from parents' home
« Reply #19 on: September 07, 2018, 08:23:44 AM »
There would be a time were I would totally agree with you.

With my search for Taoism I fond Alan Watts that completely changed my view.

Before Alan the only thing that ever bothered, questioned me was the nucleus of everything, everything was superficial.

I did introspective thinking, philosophy searching, psychoanalyses, had empathy trying to understand the other side.

But the question and dough was always there, what is the nucleus, what is the point of living and dying?

In my opinion was to leave a legacy, to leave a good memory on others, but what then?

Alan Watts didn't change my life, he give me a life, before him I was a corpse without any particular reason or meaning.

Alan Watts is a teacher of Zen, which is 90% Taoism, which is the basic structure of Dudeism.

By that I don't think you should think differently just because you see trued in Dudeism, I'm saying the exact opposite.

You shouldn't take anything seriously, the point of the dance is the dance.

I believe that until you realize that you are the everything, there are not separate entities, you will live in fear.

All this questions, opinions, perspectives are absolutely nothing, and eventually you'll realize the nucleus behind all of them.

I'm not trying to change your 'self', I'm trying to show you a blip of what is my trued.

There was a time when I would agree with all of that.
Now I have zero patience for Alan Watts and alike. At most it's a coffee table book. A curiosity.
I minored in Philosophy so I'm well aware of the genuine coda. With a major in Literature.
Later engineering.
The modern world of social media has colored my views of the utility of such en-devours.
That and I've grown up.
Most of the fascination with new age crap is nothing but a convenient mechanism for "head in sand" burying.
You want meaning?
In general it is taking care of those around you.
Fulfilling our responsibilities. Getting out of bed day after day and dragging home a buck or two each week so you can take care of your kids.
Zen, Taoism, Scientology, Satanism whatever. It only matters if it helps you do the above.
Raise good kids, be a good husband and father and don't be a burden on others.
Guaranteed that is about 99% most likely to be the genuine meaning that any of us are likely to have.
Anything else if gravy. And about 99% of the time a distraction. Or at worst an excuse.
For every genuine Allan Watts online preaching his new age mumbo jumbo there are a thousand bums who just shift there gaze from genuine responsibility and hard work not because they are a genius bound for higher things. But because real life is a drag. It's hard.
The one aspect of the Big Lebowski that has grown to bother me the most is the idea that The Dude, any Dude who is unemployed and lazy is going to be happy. It's just not a recipe for happiness. That is the major weakness of the saga. It's easy to like every Dude. They tie the room together.
We all know them. But in the real world they are (and lets face it should be) a tragic saga. They end up over 30 in their parents basement still mumbling about some new age nonsense rather than doing what their parents did. Get a job.

BTW: The real life Dude is not lazy or unemployed.

 

Out here we are all his children

BikerDude

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Re: 30-year-old evicted from parents' home
« Reply #20 on: September 07, 2018, 11:37:28 AM »
30 year old evicted!


Out here we are all his children

EsmagaSapos

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Re: 30-year-old evicted from parents' home
« Reply #21 on: September 11, 2018, 02:19:41 PM »
I can't say you should live like this or like that, because I don't know, I know my truth. And my truth is that Alan Watts go to the nucleus of almost every aspect of the 20/21 century living and he explains in a way that makes totally sense why is absurd to live that way, but is not saying you should change. I already knew it was absurd, maybe that's why I liked The Big Lebowski in the first place, I just didn't knew someone that could take it as deeply. If you are tired of the game, then you should change, if you aren't, like I believe you aren't, just play that game, and if you want to take it seriously don't even call it a game, but something else. I have a job which I don't consider a job, because I want to go there most of the times, a house, car, not wife, not kids, I'm not expecting to have actually, my liberty is in the lack of responsibility and in trying as much not to use the mask. Personally, I have empathy on both sides of this situation, because I see the flaws on both of them, can't really say who is right and who is wrong.
« Last Edit: September 11, 2018, 02:22:16 PM by EsmagaSapos »

thevideoartist

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Re: 30-year-old evicted from parents' home
« Reply #22 on: September 24, 2018, 11:55:49 AM »
My opinion of Watts wasn't that his vision was to rescue everyone from "the game" of modern life... he was trying to point out that modern life makes anxiety superfluous and that we add more to the game than there needs to be.  Since human beings were hunter-gatherers initially, we developed lots of survival systems to keep us safe in the face of potentially mortal danger.  Since society evolved we replaced hunting and scavenging with working and consuming... both equally numbing pursuits to base your whole life around... and yet we experience fight or flight responses to stress within them.  Despite the fact that our lives are generally not on the line most of the time in modern society, the body tells the brain that we are.

I think his assertions boil down to the fact we need to unlearn our behaviors and take a different approach to life that isn't rooted in life/death/work/consumption but rather flowing through it, enjoying it.  That crappy job may get you down, but it won't kill you, it'll give you the necessary means for necessary means for a modest existence so make the most of your time outside work.  If it's impossible to transcend that then leave it and pursue something else, the stakes are low, you aren't going to die taking on a risk like that... it's job hunting not big game hunting.  Someone aligned with the Tao doesn't rush and doesn't struggle or fret, they do what needs to be done and move on to the next thing.  It doesn't mean doing nothing, it means doing the things that fit your inner nature, and using those to secure your basic needs and don't buy into the consumerist mentality that is just a waste of your resources in order to obtain things that will not satisfy you or fill a need for purpose the way that enjoying where you are, when you are, and what is around you in the moment will.

That's the difference.  If you know that your body needs food, clothing, shelter, etc... it isn't "woke" to refuse to pursue those things and rely on someone else... it's parasitic.  My buddies didn't die facedown in the muck so this guy could freeload and call it freedom.  I mean the guy could even just start a blog about his philosophy and make some kind of coin either from ads or sponsorship or subscriptions or even just asking tips of people, and get a modestly priced receptacle in which to carry out his adult life; I kinda picture The Dude has to have some kind of income and I bet it's just as passive even though we never learn what it is.  It's fine if our slacker friend here wants to turn down specific jobs because they aren't a good fit for him, it's kinda foolish from where I sit, but fine.  For him to turn down the concept entirely and expect to get custody of his kids back isn't really a swiss fucking watch of a plan though.

This is coming from a guy whose parents DID kick him out after he moved back home from college... not because I wasn't working hard... but because they didn't think videography and motion graphics was a real career and after a month of watching me do it and not being paid very well (don't work for christians man... least honest and fair folks in the country)... decided they didn't have to put me up anymore... after all I was 19 and should be able to take care of myself right?  I had to move into a really shitty apartment with a drug dealer for a roommate but I did it and I found work, stayed below my means, and now I have 15 years of experience in my field, a wife and kid, my own place in a major metro area, and no need to eat rice and beans for every meal, and along the way I turned down many potential employers that offered me steady work but in a completely different field where I knew I wouldn't fit and would be miserable.  My folks were human paraquat for doing that to me and I showed them that by playing the game MY way and making it work... this guy's parents aren't getting to play the game their way because he refuses to play altogether.  That's not how the world works, that's not how the Tao works, that's not how The Dude works.  They had every right to evict him and he has every right to deal with the aftermath of his choices as well as make some new ones to govern his own path.  If he can abide the ups and downs strikes and gutters then he'll do alright for himself in the end... might even be a purty good story.

EsmagaSapos

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Re: 30-year-old evicted from parents' home
« Reply #23 on: September 25, 2018, 04:20:25 AM »
If we see how Alan Watts lived is life we might think he did things we condemn if we follow the values given to us by our society. He was a heavy drinker, the doctor told him: 'You will die if you don't stop drinking, your liver can't take it anymore.' and he never stopped, die because of it. He felt depressed taking care of his own children's. He was sexual depraved, to a bizarre level they say, his wifes couldn't be in the same tune, so he was constantly masturbating and trying to find womens out of his marriage to satisfy those needs.  If we follow our conciseness we might things this as something to condemn, but like I said before conciseness is made of values, and those values were given to us by society, is also made of memory and according to Zen you shouldn't live from memories, because there is only present.   

BikerDude

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Re: 30-year-old evicted from parents' home
« Reply #24 on: September 25, 2018, 08:33:31 AM »
I have come to see most of the Alan Watts' of the world as a bad influence.
If the Tao is "the natural order of the universe whose character human intuition must discern in order to realize the potential for individual wisdom" then I would suggest that all evidence points toward a universe that is marked by struggle. Going with the flow may be in fact missing the point.
All things being equal, for 99.99999% of the people out there the road to happiness is pretty obvious.
It might have it's bumps and wrong turns but in the end it lies in some modicum of success that affords a person a decent living and life style.
At least.
Young people who haven't made their way to a place of relative security are very very ill served by the harmful promises that following some road that simply amounts to a giant excuse and a permission to duck the difficult stuff.
The "finding yourself" thing is a giant bunch of bullshit.
The reality is that money buys freedom. If you want to find yourself first find a way to make a really good living.
That IS the process of finding yourself.
Most times when people claim different priorities they are full of shit.
And eventually no matter how hard they try to run away from it, they eventually have to face it.
All the movies in the world about happy slackers won't change the reality that middle age slackers are not happy.
Never have been. Never will be. Don't believe the hype. We have one life. Don't waste it.
Sadly, for almost every person you will ever know the best advice really is "Do as your parents did. Get a job sir!"


Out here we are all his children

EsmagaSapos

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Re: 30-year-old evicted from parents' home
« Reply #25 on: September 25, 2018, 11:55:12 AM »
You have the most capitalist though process I've ever saw, but I'm okay with it, as long as you accept what you believe is an opinion, like I accept mine.

The 'finding ourself' stuff is also in my opinion bullshit, because you can't find yourself, the things you like, that interest you, you like them because you have been influenced by the environment you are in, and the amount of curiosity, dedication, rigor and persistence is what will make you good at it, you will get skill, but saying that the road to finding yourself is having a nice living is absurd, I mean in my opinion, doesn't make sense.

How is don't having a job, giving value to different things and want a different path the easy way? Having your perspective is the easy way, is what almost everyone is doing. They are focused on a carrear, they focus on the future without ever living the present, when they get to that future they will be thinking on the next future.

Money doesn't buy freedom, not even close. What money buys, for me, is irresponsibility, is a sense of security and that is my freedom, even so, I know that's a flaw (something I know you don't agree).

I believe you ended up trapped by the idea that knowledge and enlightenment end up with ruin, and you might be totally right, so you decided that the right way is to join the majority, but that is not the solution either. 

BikerDude

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Re: 30-year-old evicted from parents' home
« Reply #26 on: September 27, 2018, 06:44:39 AM »

Money doesn't buy freedom, not even close. What money buys, for me, is irresponsibility, is a sense of security and that is my freedom, even so, I know that's a flaw (something I know you don't agree).


You gotta feed the monkey Dude.
That is universal. Food, shelter, transport.
If you work for peanuts then you have to spend all your time fulfilling basic needs.
Or be a burden on society and live off other people hard work.
Once you have a cushion, money in the bank, possessions you can focus on things that don't earn money.
More of you time can be spent on things you actually like.
I don't know what is confusing about that.
The average person doesn't have the luxury of persuading every whim that they might have.
Unless they are wealthy.

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BikerDude

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Re: 30-year-old evicted from parents' home
« Reply #27 on: September 27, 2018, 06:46:33 AM »
Oh and this has nothing to do with capitalism.
It's reality. It's the same for monkeys and squirrels and marmots.

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EsmagaSapos

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Re: 30-year-old evicted from parents' home
« Reply #28 on: September 27, 2018, 09:34:48 AM »
The beginning of society was also the beginning of the language, you can now create myths and then symbols, if everyone agrees to play by the rules, the system of money works.

We started agriculture by the same sense of fear the future and to gain security and the need of control.

It went from: 'If we don't find food we will all die' to 'If you eat my food, you will die' to 'Ah, I'm full but I will eat some more' and then to the no-gluten and diet shits. Is also the beginning of consumerism.

If you believe in the myth of working to be compensated with money so you can buy pleasure to experience when you aren't working, I believe you will not find what you are really looking for.

And no, it's not reality, reality is when you go to far deep forest and just hear noise without naming it, is the deep self where is everything, some call it God, other's something else, is yes a game that we are playing, it doesn't mean they are lies it only means that they are abstractions that only live in our heads, they are not realities, but deep rooted assumptions.

Monkeys and squirrels and marmots live by instinct and instinct is spontaneous act, they don't play games based on names, symbols, myths and ideas.

BikerDude

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Re: 30-year-old evicted from parents' home
« Reply #29 on: September 27, 2018, 10:17:15 AM »
The beginning of society was also the beginning of the language, you can now create myths and then symbols, if everyone agrees to play by the rules, the system of money works.

We started agriculture by the same sense of fear the future and to gain security and the need of control.

It went from: 'If we don't find food we will all die' to 'If you eat my food, you will die' to 'Ah, I'm full but I will eat some more' and then to the no-gluten and diet shits. Is also the beginning of consumerism.

If you believe in the myth of working to be compensated with money so you can buy pleasure to experience when you aren't working, I believe you will not find what you are really looking for.

And no, it's not reality, reality is when you go to far deep forest and just hear noise without naming it, is the deep self where is everything, some call it God, other's something else, is yes a game that we are playing, it doesn't mean they are lies it only means that they are abstractions that only live in our heads, they are not realities, but deep rooted assumptions.

Monkeys and squirrels and marmots live by instinct and instinct is spontaneous act, they don't play games based on names, symbols, myths and ideas.


Well I don't see how any of this applies to your need to eat or have a home or a car.
I don't believe in the "myth" of working for being compensated by money.
I believe in the real world.
I believe in eating and not freezing and having stuff.
Going deep in the forest and just hearing noise without naming it is "a reality".
But it won't pay the bills.
Fundamentally I really find this sort of take on things as breathtakingly arrogant.
Essentially you are saying that basically all of the people going about normal lives, working and raising families and going to jobs everyday doing shit that keeps the world running on track are somehow ignorant because they don't stand around in the woods with their heads in the clouds all day.

Out here we are all his children

 

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