Yesterday I learned that a family friend killed herself. Our families have know each other since I was very young. She had a lot of troubles (won't go into them), but no one knew how bad things had gotten. Here's the thing. I'm going to miss her because she and her siblings are almost like my cousins (I don't have any family here except my mother and siblings). But I know similar feelings. A long time ago, I was in her place and tried a few times to do the same thing.
Obviously I'm not going to go to her family and offer any help understanding why. Hell, I can't even discuss it these days with my family. It's going to bother me that people look for answers. If you've ever been there, you know that no one else can understand it. It's not a cowardly act, it's not a kneejerk or sudden one, or any of that.
I really don't know why I'm posting this. It just sucks. Like really, really sucks. I lost a friend long ago to suicide and now her. This is a real issue, fellow dudes. If you ever have a friend who you're afraid is thinking of it, talk to them. Don't be afraid. You can't put the idea into their heads.
I guess I just want you all to know that there are some of you I will never agree on anything with. There are some here in the past that I'll never be good friends with. But I will crack open a beverage of your choice, alcoholic or not, and let you rant and bitch and all that. Sometimes the fight is too exhausting and will knock you down, but please keep fighting it or find another fight.
That's a very sad story, Masked Dude. You're right, there's no one answer to depression -- it's a tangled web of uptight thoughts and deep sadness. We need to be there for each other.
Take care, Masked Dude, and keep on abiding through the sadness. So sorry for your loss.
DB's head is bowed. :( May she rest in dudely peace. Goodnight sweet princess. :(
*Head bowed...*
I know I'm a little late on this one but I have been going through a pretty rough time myself it's been a struggle to abide. Going through a break up a lot depression and anxiety issues. Like you said a lot of strands in this dudes head. I gotta say to anyone fighting this bar if it gets to uptight in your head don't be afraid or embarrassed to use the crisis lines. They have saved me several times they are good dudes letting it out to a stranger may seem hard but when you do it's like being able to just put down the load for a little bit and you will limber up the mind become aware of some new shit and help you get a bit closer to takin er easy again.