The Dudeism Forum

General Category => General Discussion => Topic started by: DigitalBuddha on August 20, 2008, 01:12:04 PM

Title: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: DigitalBuddha on August 20, 2008, 01:12:04 PM
Turtle was a good man, and thorough..............


Hate to see a good dude fall, has Turtle bought the farm? Anyone heard from T-dude?
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: the Knutsens on August 20, 2008, 04:01:37 PM
He is probably eyeball to eyeball with a man in black pyjamas.
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: Andrea D. on August 20, 2008, 05:49:15 PM
He's bowling  :)
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: DigitalBuddha on August 20, 2008, 10:33:53 PM
I was thinking that Turtle had a visit from Woo and his buddy and they went for a ride to see Jackie Treehorn and then got tossed out of the cab and was walking home.
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: Andrea D. on August 21, 2008, 11:37:41 AM
Yeah...or maybe he changed the station.
But seriously i'm pretty worried about our Turtle because Waldo was bother him...maybe is the stress talking  :(
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: DigitalBuddha on August 21, 2008, 02:08:07 PM
Quote from: Andrea Dudette on August 21, 2008, 11:37:41 AM
Yeah...or maybe he changed the station.
But seriously i'm pretty worried about our Turtle because Waldo was bother him...maybe is the stress talking  :(

Maybe Waldo's unchecked aggression is staking Turdle. That's a bummer, man.
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: Dude1967 on August 21, 2008, 04:05:13 PM
Quote from: digitalbuddha on August 20, 2008, 10:33:53 PM
I was thinking that Turtle had a visit from Woo and his buddy and they went for a ride to see Jackie Treehorn and then got tossed out of the cab and was walking home.
Jackie Treehorn, a worthy adversary, not like that Waldofucker in Iraq
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: brandt on August 21, 2008, 10:08:52 PM
Phone's ringin' Turtle
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: DigitalBuddha on August 22, 2008, 12:48:05 AM
For a while I thought that the judge tossed Turtle in the can, man. But for a $80 fine? Fuck, no way. 80 clams or community service. Turtle is probably abiding his time working the $80 off at the local Red Cross or something. My other theory was that he was involved in the protest to take over Hawaii and restore the Hawaiian monarchy.  ;D
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: SmokeytheBuddha on August 22, 2008, 06:57:03 AM
Here's hoping the Turtle abides...
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: Andrea D. on August 22, 2008, 11:27:27 AM
I got information-new shit has come to light and-shit, man! 
He kidnapped himself
Well sure, look at it!  Young trophy turtle, I mean, in the parlance of our times, owes money all over Hawaii, including to known pornographers--and that's cool, that's cool-- but i'm saying, he needs money, and of course they're gonna say they didn't get it 'cause he wants more, man, he's gotta feed the monkey, I mean--
hasn't that ever occurred to you...? 
Sir?
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: the Knutsens on August 22, 2008, 08:06:14 PM
Maybe the Turtle simply decided to just drive to Palm Springs to visit his friends and not tell anybody. At least the nihilists haven't got a hold of him.
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: DigitalBuddha on August 23, 2008, 12:06:33 AM
You thought Turtle'd been kidnapped and you could use it as a pretext to make some money disappear.  All you needed was a sap to pin it on, and you'd just met me.  You thought, hey, a deadbeat, a loser, someone the square community won't give a shit about.
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: DigitalBuddha on August 23, 2008, 12:08:53 AM
Quote from: SmokeytheBuddha on August 22, 2008, 06:57:03 AM
Here's hoping the Turtle abides...

You got any Kahlua?
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: Dude1967 on August 23, 2008, 08:00:39 AM
  As you can see, it is a ransom note.   Sent by cowards.  Men who are unable to achieve on a level field of play.   Men who will not sign their names.     Weaklings.  Bums.

               THE DUDE EXAMINES THE FAX:

               WE HAVE TURTLE.  GATHER ONE MILLION DOLLARS IN UNMARKED NON-CONSECUTIVE TWENTIES.  AWAIT INSTRUCTIONS.  NO FUNNY STUFF.

Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: Turtle on August 23, 2008, 08:23:45 AM
What are you dudes blathering about?

;D
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: DigitalBuddha on August 23, 2008, 12:50:42 PM
Quote from: Turtle on August 23, 2008, 08:23:45 AM
What are you dudes blathering about?

;D
Where the fuck have you been, man? Beeper went off during league play?
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: Dude1967 on August 23, 2008, 01:17:59 PM
Quote from: Turtle on August 23, 2008, 08:23:45 AM
What are you dudes blathering about?

;D
No, Walter!  I said I thought he kidnapped himself!  You're the one who's so fucking certain--

Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: DigitalBuddha on August 23, 2008, 06:15:03 PM
Quote from: Dude1967 on August 23, 2008, 01:17:59 PM
Quote from: Turtle on August 23, 2008, 08:23:45 AM
What are you dudes blathering about?

;D
No, Walter!  I said I thought he kidnapped himself!  You're the one who's so fucking certain--



That's right, dude.  ;D
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: SmokeytheBuddha on August 25, 2008, 09:24:54 AM
Quote from: Turtle on August 23, 2008, 08:23:45 AM
What are you dudes blathering about?

;D

My God sir, we will not abide another toe.
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: Dude1967 on August 25, 2008, 12:01:44 PM
  Wal, I lost m'train of thought here. But--aw hell, I done innerduced turtle enough.
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: DigitalBuddha on August 25, 2008, 04:41:28 PM
I think Turtle's post was a God Damned fake, man.....Maybe Waldo, and Waldo's wife who was killed by nazis, kidnapped Turtle, mang.......................

WE HAVE TURTLE.  GATHER ONE MILLION DOLLARS IN UNMARKED NON-CONSECUTIVE TWENTIES.  AWAIT INSTRUCTIONS.  NO FUNNY STUFF.

;D
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: Turtle on August 25, 2008, 09:44:43 PM
The nihilists would like me to tell you that they are treating me very well (aaaabulshitchooo),
....excuse me... and I am starting to understand their non-ethos as the true way (aaaabulshitchooo)
....sorry, hay fever.... They would like you to send them a million dollars to support their beliefs...in...ah....
nothing....they will spend this money to purchase a prosthetic toe and to pay off the fines acquired from traveling with a marmot, you know, wildlife...an amphibious rodent...for domestic...inside the city limits.

Oh....and they said.....no funny stuff!

PS If you cannot get the money, then please try to get a toe by 3 o'clock...with nailpolish.
If you cannot get even that, then they said they will just take what you have on you, and
they callz it even.
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: DigitalBuddha on August 25, 2008, 11:46:21 PM
Dudeism suspects that the culprits might be the very people who, uh, soiled Turtles rug, and is in a unique position to confirm or, uh, disconfirm that suspicion.

Mr. Dudeism is prepared to make a generous offer to you to act as courier once we get instructions for the money.

Dudeism thinks it's the Waldo-pissers, huh?

Well Dude, we just don't know.



......................Brandt will fill you in on the details.
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: Dude1967 on August 28, 2008, 10:44:09 AM
Quote from: digitalbuddha on August 25, 2008, 11:46:21 PM
Dudeism suspects that the culprits might be the very people who, uh, soiled Turtles rug, and is in a unique position to confirm or, uh, disconfirm that suspicion.

Mr. Dudeism is prepared to make a generous offer to you to act as courier once we get instructions for the money.

Dudeism thinks it's the Waldo-pissers, huh?

Well Dude, we just don't know.



......................Brandt will fill you in on the details.
Brandt can't fill you in on the details, or he has to pay $100
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: brandt on August 28, 2008, 02:10:40 PM
This is our concern ,Turtle :o
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: DigitalBuddha on August 29, 2008, 12:13:59 AM
I think Turtle needs some cash to feed the monkey, man. Ah, let me see, I think its down their somewhere....Come on, Walter, we're ending this thing cheap. Four dollars here! Almost five!
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: the Knutsens on August 29, 2008, 01:17:42 PM
Everything seems to be fine, as long as there is no funny stuff!
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: brandt on August 29, 2008, 03:53:31 PM
What I see here is  a series of victimles crimes

Turtle kidnapped himself, Dude, you said so yourself
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: Dude1967 on August 29, 2008, 06:45:12 PM
 Oh, man.  Don't do--

Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: DigitalBuddha on August 31, 2008, 02:43:45 AM
Quote from: brandt on August 29, 2008, 03:53:31 PM
What I see here is  a series of victimles crimes

Turtle kidnapped himself, Dude, you said so yourself

You think veer kidding und making mit de funny stuff?
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: Dude1967 on August 31, 2008, 08:03:00 AM
 That's a Los Angeles Chamber of Commerce Business Achiever award, which is given--not necessarily given every year!  Given only when there's  a worthy, somebody especially--
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: brandt on August 31, 2008, 09:36:47 AM
So racially he's pretty cool?
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: Dude1967 on August 31, 2008, 06:23:39 PM
   ...which would place him high in the runnin' for laziest worldwide--but, sometimes there's a man. . . sometimes there's a man.
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: brandt on August 31, 2008, 09:59:08 PM
What makes a man, Mr. Lebowski ???
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: Dude1967 on September 01, 2008, 04:04:21 AM
Quote from: brandt on August 31, 2008, 09:59:08 PM
What makes a man, Mr. Lebowski ???
Coitus?
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: brandt on September 01, 2008, 09:26:21 PM
 Look, Maude, I'm sorry your mother is a nympho :(
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: Dude1967 on September 02, 2008, 07:42:59 AM
Quote from: brandt on September 01, 2008, 09:26:21 PM
Look, Maude, I'm sorry your mother is a nympho :(
One a those days, huh.  Wal, a wiser  fella than m'self once said, sometimes
                         you eat the bar and sometimes the bar, wal, he eats you.
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: brandt on September 03, 2008, 04:04:55 PM
Not if I have anything to say about it!
Title: Re: Turtle IS a good man...............
Post by: Turtle on September 04, 2008, 02:20:19 AM
I'm still a good man dudes.
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: Dude1967 on September 04, 2008, 06:08:04 AM
Quote from: Turtle on September 04, 2008, 02:20:19 AM
I'm still a good man dudes.
Fuckin' A.  Turtle IS a good man.  And thorough.
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: the Knutsens on September 04, 2008, 10:15:43 AM
Could you slide your shorts down, please?
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: brandt on September 04, 2008, 02:28:42 PM
He did not die face down in the muck

I think he went with that strumpet who owes money all over town

After all, you gotta feed the Turtle, man..sir
Title: Re: Turtle IS a good man...............
Post by: DigitalBuddha on September 05, 2008, 01:33:30 AM
Quote from: Turtle on September 04, 2008, 02:20:19 AM
I'm still a good man dudes.

Good to see you here, dude. Keep abiding.
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: Turtle on September 05, 2008, 03:20:14 AM
Quote from: brandt on September 04, 2008, 02:28:42 PM
He did not die face down in the muck

I think he went with that strumpet who owes money all over town

After all, you gotta feed the Turtle, man..sir

Turtle and Bunny...hmm...thats fucking interesting man, thats fucking interesting.
Title: Re: Turtle IS a good man...............
Post by: Andrea D. on September 05, 2008, 10:45:08 AM
Quote from: Turtle on September 04, 2008, 02:20:19 AM
I'm still a good man dudes.

And a good day to you Sr !
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: Dude1967 on September 05, 2008, 04:45:19 PM
Quote from: Turtle on September 05, 2008, 03:20:14 AM
Quote from: brandt on September 04, 2008, 02:28:42 PM
He did not die face down in the muck

I think he went with that strumpet who owes money all over town

After all, you gotta feed the Turtle, man..sir

Turtle and Bunny...hmm...thats fucking interesting man, thats fucking interesting.
yeah, I always thought that Turtle would end up with Maude myself
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: brandt on September 05, 2008, 09:32:58 PM
I take comfort in that
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: DigitalBuddha on September 06, 2008, 03:08:49 PM
Quote from: brandt on September 05, 2008, 09:32:58 PM
I take comfort in that

The Turtle; takin' er easy for all us sinners  ;D
Title: Re: Turtle was a good man...............
Post by: brandt on September 06, 2008, 09:47:17 PM
That's his homework..Maude or Bunny..and in english....stupefyin'!