Hilarious Fucking amateurs just sent my company a ransom note.

[thevideoartist]

Some of you dudes might get a kick out of this if you're into cybersecurity or found the whole ransom plot in TBL to be one of the most amusing aspects of the film like I did.

So today someone at my small and very uncontroversial video company discovered several of our files were encrypted and the file names were changed to "LeChiffre"... as in the bad guy from Casino Royale.  Among the files was a plain text ransom note which I will post here now:

"Hello.
Your some files were encrypted with the strongest cipher RSA 1024 and AES.  No one will help you to restore files without our decoder.  Any programs for recovering files or disk repair are useless and can destroy your files irreversibly.  Irreversibly. So don't try to decrypt it yourself.  We warned you.

There is only one way to restore your files - send e-mail to lechiffre@india.com with attached file"_how to decode[RCAXSERVE].txt" (you read this file right now). To test our honesty you can send an one encrypted file less than 4 MB (not zipped) as *.doc *.xls *.jpg *.pdf, but not database file or backup file (*.900 *.001 *.dv *.zip *.rar *.bkp etc).

We will decode your sample for free.

You will recieve deciphered sample and our conditions how you will get the decoder.  Follow the instructions to send the payment.  Be attentive! The decoder for each server is paid separately.

P.S. Remember, we are not scammers.  We don't need your files.  If you want, you can get the password for free after 6 month wait.
Just send a request immediately after infection and download the decoder.
All data will be restored absolutely.

Our guarantee of honesty - your deciphered sample."

I definitely read the entire thing in a german accent and couldn't stop cracking up.  At least they're "not scammers" and it comes with a "guarantee of honesty"... such a classy weasel.  I wonder what we did to piss off india, I'll have to ask if we ever produced an anti-cow documentary I never knew about.

The best part is that the files they encrypted and are holding hostage are backup data that is 5-8 years old that we will likely never use and if we do we have in other places completely encryption free.  WITHOUT A HOSTAGE THERE IS NO RANSOM!!! THOSE ARE THE FUCKING RULES!!!   HAHAHA!

I wonder if I should explain it to them or not... their plan was a swiss fucking watch except that it wasn't.  Oh man.  This was the pick-me-up I needed after this otherwise shitty weekend.

Hope you enjoy dudes.

[Dudelonious.Funk]

 

was a pretty good story dude lol

take it easy