Enlightenment in 3 minutes, gar-un-teeed.

[wuliheron]

Over half the time when some Dude is foolish enough to ask my ignorant advice I just tell them:

When in trouble, when in doubt,
Run in circles, scream and shout!
If that doesn't work, keep trying to figure it out,
Just laugh at the punch lines,
And the truth will come out.
Don't waste your guilt or anger,
Put it all to good use,
Stupid jokes are sometimes priceless,
When encouraged to be obtuse.

Enlightenment as far as I can tell means reality is for those who can't handle the truth because they don't get the running joke that the truth keeps changing with each new punch line. I often suggest they watch more cartoons.

[RevKHyler]

Amen, my Dudeist brother! I've gotten more enlightenment from old Wiley Coyote and Roadrunner cartoons than I ever got from a church. (I prefer the pre-1975 Looney Tunes.)
My other influence would be Monty Python but I won't go there...

[wuliheron]

There's this cartoon I need to check out because I never got the chance before and it went off the air. My warrior-midwife big brother Lilu knows the name, but it was a cartoon about life in a ghetto tenement complete with crack addicts living in the halls and whatnot. I've already got a good start on a story I call "Ignorant Hillbilly Redneck Suburbanite hippy commie freak city slicker" (Title might need some work). Anyway I need a ghetto version to go with it and Lilu (Lalu) knows ghetto humor like nobody else I know. Both are based on an old hippy joke that we're all ignorant redneck hillbilly hippy freaks and anyone tries to tell my mama she can't call me that is asking for a whipping.

[DigitalBuddha]

Dude, it just like my opinion, man, but I think the whole "enlightenment" thing is a crock of horse shit concocted by self appointed "gurus" and self styled "holy men." I think a person can experience all kinds of "enlightenment" everyday, all the time, in all kinds of ways, which is often a change in opinion, attitude and perhaps an understanding of things; the "ah ha!" sudden flash of understanding and insight into and of something you never had before; perhaps when you first understood relativity or what a dude meant when he told you In-And-Out-Burgers are "those are good burgers, dude" and you ate one and became "burger" enlightened." It doesn't take special training, banging gongs all day, muttering holy words or sitting in the lotus position until your legs fall asleep and your ass hurts. Hell, this can bring a daily dose of some fine enlightenment as much as any bullshit phony guru gold bricker could ever help you achieve.......



And definitely this.........



Enlightenment isn't a final goal, its a path to walk and enjoy everyday. That's just like my burger opinion, man.

My temple of enlightenment.......

[wuliheron]

As far as I'm concerned if it doesn't make me laugh it's probably nothing I need to know or do. However, I do know this one Taoist master dude who meditates all day. He says the only time he can't meditate is when driving in LA traffic, which, is pretty understandable if you've ever been there. Really nice guy and very insightful, but I seldom heard him crack a joke.

[BrotherShamus]

wuliheron are you talking about that show "the projects"?

[wuliheron]

I had to look it up but, yeah, that's it. The "PJs" as it was called with Eddie Murphy

[DigitalBuddha]

As far as I'm concerned if it doesn't make me laugh it's probably nothing I need to know or do. However, I do know this one Taoist master dude who meditates all day. He says the only time he can't meditate is when driving in LA traffic, which, is pretty understandable if you've ever been there. Really nice guy and very insightful, but I seldom heard him crack a joke.

That's why I like Alan Watts, he taught that a dude could even find enlightenment in an ash tray. Also, speaking of laughter, after he became the dudely departed, his family said about his passing ceremony "come and join Alan's laughter as it circles the universe." That personified his attitude in life; enlightenment through laughter.

Check out - http://alanwatts.com/life-and-works/

[wuliheron]

The Zen prefer the belly laugh of drama, while the Tao prefer the gentle laughter of the toddler at a dust bunny. Allan studied Zen for who knows how long, and decided he preferred the more gentle humor of the Tao. It happens as you get older and in places like Japan the senior citizens are famous for their public displays of charming toddler humor, while pretending to be senile. Studies have shown merely the fact that seniors have more time to stop and smell the flowers usually accounts for the difference.

[DigitalBuddha]

The Zen prefer the belly laugh of drama, while the Tao prefer the gentle laughter of the toddler at a dust bunny. Allan studied Zen for who knows how long, and decided he preferred the more gentle humor of the Tao. It happens as you get older and in places like Japan the senior citizens are famous for their public displays of charming toddler humor, while pretending to be senile. Studies have shown merely the fact that seniors have more time to stop and smell the flowers usually accounts for the difference.

Also, senior citizens have more time to burn a J

[wuliheron]

More time to burn as well, but it is the time they take to appreciate the little things in their lives like a toddler that makes them appreciate toddler humor more.

[DigitalBuddha]

Speaking of bullshit gurus; The arrogance of clergy .......

"Another true irony is that if there is a Jesus and if he ever comes back the professional Christians will almost certainly murder him again."

A word to the faithful - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=STlYN5KCiWg

[wuliheron]

One of the first things Hitler did was make it treason for comics to crack jokes about the Nazi party and one of the first things the Christians did was to kill the Gnostics. I just finished a conversation with a guy who said I made him sound cold and heartless, but I told him I merely thought of him having an underdeveloped sense of humor and way too serious about pushing his personal pet peeves on the rest of the world. Descartes had it wrong and it is, "I laugh, therefore I am". Trying to understand logic and philosophy without a well developed sense of humor is like making love to a rubber doll and the confusion and mayhem becomes inevitable.

[LotsaBadKarma]

making love to a rubber doll

Dude, everybody knows that's just a sport-fuck! OK, well, maybe not everybody.

As far as the enlightenment thing goes, although it's been a while since I read Siddhartha, I don't remember the Buddha having a guru. I think he found enlightenment by sitting under a tree somewhere. Maybe what happened is he learned that by sitting under a tree and watching the world go by with all its hustle and bustle that the true enlightenment is to just learn to relax. And not just learn it but do it, religiously. Kinda like the old saying that advises us "don't just do something, stand (or sit) there".

[wuliheron]

Dude, everybody knows that's just a sport-fuck! OK, well, maybe not everybody.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z_A96olIO3k