Special lady friend now wants to go to the Bahamas

Started by Rev Dave Man, October 11, 2017, 06:34:25 AM

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Rev Dave Man

October 11, 2017, 06:34:25 AM
So apparently some new shit has come to light man.  My special lady friend has booked us a wedding package in the BAHAMAS for next august.  Originally it was supposed to be in St.Thomas, but the hurricanes have leveled our resort.  Now, there's something you need to know about this dude, and that is , I DON'T FLY!  I will roll on Shabbos, I'll even abide another toe, but I DON'T FLY.  How do I get around this thing man? Sir?  My special lady friend is a real great gal, losing her would be a bummer, but I am already uptight about flying and it's almost a year away.  She has sent me to hypnotherapy in the past, to no avail, and when I have flown, I'm more juiced than a Jackie Treehorn caucasian, but I'm already stressing about hurtling through the sky in a metal death tube that defies the laws of gravity.  And my special lady friend has her heart set on this wedding being at a nice quiet beach community.  I've already begun my regimen of hard drinking to keep my mind limber, but at this pace I'm gonna need a liver transplant prior to the nuptials. How do I assuage my crippling fear of flying without disappointing my special lady friend?
Fortunately, I'm adhering to a pretty strict, uh, drug, uh, regimen to keep my mind, you know, uh, limber

Dudeist Monk

#1
October 11, 2017, 07:44:38 AM
Damn! Wish I could help you, Brother, but I love flying. Love it. Even (especially) the turbulence.

All, I can recommend is to take along one or two of the Dudely Llama's books and try to take your mind off it.
If at first you don't succeed ... Um ... Yeah. Whatever and stuff.

Dudeist Monk - Militant Inactivist.

BikerDude

#2
October 13, 2017, 08:13:57 AM
Drugs and alcohol.


Out here we are all his children

DigitalBuddha

#3
October 13, 2017, 06:39:49 PM
re. " I DON'T FLY!  I will roll on Shabbos, I'll even abide another toe, but I DON'T FLY.  How do I get around this thing man? Sir? "

Zesty coitus................an as advised by BikerDude, Drugs and alcohol; BEER!

jgiffin

#4
October 13, 2017, 10:16:01 PM
It probably wouldn't work since the wedding package is already booked but maybe a cruise? Not sure how cruises go, though. I think it would just be a couple hours of shore time for you to get hitched and then back on the boat. They always seemed anticlimactic to me. Spend all your time getting somewhere instead of being there. Then again, maybe I'm too focused on the destination instead of the journey.

Ah, there I go: rambling again. Good luck, dude. If worse comes to worse, just get all medicated-up and sleep through the flight.
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