my son is getting married, and i am not happy!

[cckeiser]

Hey Busmum,

It's life man. How would the Dude handle this space. Don't sweat it and the whole thing may surprise you. I married at 23 and 26 years later we have twin 22 yr old Dudes and a beautiful 18 yr old Dudette. Wow what a rush but I wouid do it all over again. Sit back have a beverage and chill man. It's all good.

Cheers,

Ozdude

Hey Ozdude!

Nice dude. Welcome to our nice quiet beach community dude.
Any rug in the place dude.

[Hominid]

Ya gotta take'r easy and step back a bit. Hell, my son got married a few weeks ago and never even TOLD me. I'm over it - it's his life, not mine. I care for him, sure - but smothering only makes it worse.  When your son figures out he was just a kid walking into the middle of a movie, maybe he'll wake the fuck up and take the lesson for what it was.

I feel for you Buzzy.

[Busmum]

you are all true dudes and sages! i'm sorry i didn't have time to respond in the days leading up to the big event, but i do appreciate what you all posted-- helped me keep my hat on. 

here's a mini-slide show of the glorius event:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SPxe-ejRpQU&feature=player_profilepage


unfortunately, cakes and i were behind the camera most of the time... 

[cckeiser]

Looks as if it was a good time...and on your birthday too.

Here's wish comfort and joy to all.

[Busmum]

it was a good time cc... not only did i get to hang with my older kids, but it was a bit of a flashback to my youth, hanging with the dudes from 25 years ago.

funny-- they are all telling the same stories! 

i, of course, was delightful and lovely!

hee hee!

[Yvelysse]

Busmum I'm new here and may not be the best to comment on such a personally felt matter.

But, I will keep your family in my thoughts.
You are in my heart as well, being a mother and a recent divorcee.
I know what your dread is.

BACKGROUND INFO: not happy new but real. I met my ex when I was 14 and he was 23. I married him when I was legal age, IE: 18, and divorced him at 47. He just remarried this past week. Only 4 months after the divorce.  When I grew up I realized even tho I loved him, felt he was my soulmate, we JUST were not compatible. He finished raising me and did that poorly. There are two (now adult) children from this union.

No one wishes this on their children so, on a positive note, plan their 'growing up'. Help guide them on the way to knowledge as they mature together. Hopefully when the bride and groom fully grow up they will still be in the same 'love' place they are today.

This is what I will foresee for them.

peace

[TulsaDudeistChick]

Hi Busmum....Just joining in here. My baby boy got married at 21 (literally got off his flight from his 2nd Iraq deployment, grabbed his girlfriend & headed to the beach & a Justice of the Peace). I really wanted him to wait til he was older, etc but the ONE thing I learned from my previous marriages was that no matter what, the best way to stay in his life was to be the cool mother in law. I'm the Dude of Mothers-in-Law & that has made everyone's lives so much better. The son & beloved bride could have named their kids Shecky, shaved their heads & raised them as Nihilists & I would smile & say "Right on"...because I know that raising any objection would send them running in the opposite direction.

On the upside - they have been married so far for almost 4 years, survived 3 more deployments & given me 2 perfect grandkids. And each one has said to me at different times "Thank you for not telling us what to do & just loving us".

(For the record, I still can't believe they made me a grandmother at 46 yrs old but I forgive them for that )