Author Topic: How can I abide when I hate the skin I'm in? (Read 2908 times)

Raika · « **on:** July 24, 2012, 11:39:45 PM »

Hey guys, how's it going. I'm Raika, man, that's what you call me. I'm twenty-four years old, I live in Georgia, and I am transgendered. If you're thinking to yourself "oh, that must be exhausting", you're right on target, and I think that two references to The Big Lebowski in the first five sentences is enough, so I'll check it from here on out.

Living with gender identity issues is extremely stressful. Essentially, when I'm at work, in the company of family, or pretty much anywhere outside of my home or certain designated places, I have to lie about who I am. I have to dress a certain way, speak a certain way, and carry myself a certain way so that people don't get weirded out and start harassing me. Even my family, with the exception of my older sister, insist that I present myself as my biological sex rather than my perceived psychological gender. Five months ago, I was ready to deliver the ultimate "fuck it" and waste myself in the most painless way I could figure, but before I could figure what way that was, I found hope. I found Dudeism.

Living like Lebowski has helped me in so many ways. My stress extends beyond my gender identity, but because of what I've learned from the teachings of Dudeism, my life has improved beyond compare. The lingering concern of my gender identity is nagging me more now, though, than ever, and so I ask my fellow latter-day Dudes this question:

If it so happened that the Dude was, in fact, a special lady, unjustly outfitted with a pair of testicles(not to mention that righteous beard), how, then, would the Dude abide, and to that point, how can I?

Any insight on this would be greatly appreciated.

Or, to use the parlance of our times: thankie.

DigitalBuddha · « **Reply #1 on:** July 25, 2012, 12:24:52 AM »

Quote from: Raika on July 24, 2012, 11:39:45 PM

Hey guys, how's it going. I'm Raika, man, that's what you call me. I'm twenty-four years old, I live in Georgia, and I am transgendered. If you're thinking to yourself "oh, that must be exhausting", you're right on target, and I think that two references to The Big Lebowski in the first five sentences is enough, so I'll check it from here on out.

Living with gender identity issues is extremely stressful. Essentially, when I'm at work, in the company of family, or pretty much anywhere outside of my home or certain designated places, I have to lie about who I am. I have to dress a certain way, speak a certain way, and carry myself a certain way so that people don't get weirded out and start harassing me. Even my family, with the exception of my older sister, insist that I present myself as my biological sex rather than my perceived psychological gender. Five months ago, I was ready to deliver the ultimate "fuck it" and waste myself in the most painless way I could figure, but before I could figure what way that was, I found hope. I found Dudeism.

Living like Lebowski has helped me in so many ways. My stress extends beyond my gender identity, but because of what I've learned from the teachings of Dudeism, my life has improved beyond compare. The lingering concern of my gender identity is nagging me more now, though, than ever, and so I ask my fellow latter-day Dudes this question:

If it so happened that the Dude was, in fact, a special lady, unjustly outfitted with a pair of testicles(not to mention that righteous beard), how, then, would the Dude abide, and to that point, how can I?

Any insight on this would be greatly appreciated.

Or, to use the parlance of our times: thankie.

Hey Raika, dude, welcome to dudetopia and our quite beach community. Grab a rug, dude, and abide. Bar's over there.

revpurdy · « **Reply #2 on:** July 25, 2012, 10:32:00 AM »

hello
part of dudeism is being true to your self at the core. no matter what you are who you are whether your bi gay straight or transgendered. its about being true to your self take it easy don't give a shit what other people think or say. all that matters is knowing who you are and being that person. part of it is we don't prescribe to stereotypical gender politics every one is a dude regardless of what genitals you have. if the dude was transgendered he would have been true to his nature and live his life how he saw fit he would abide and go with it. i hope this is helping if you want to talk more feel free to respond asking for more or even shoot me a PM or email i am always glad to help some one that just needs to talk.

cckeiser · « **Reply #3 on:** July 25, 2012, 11:22:39 AM »

The purpose of life is to live it.
You are the only one who can live your life. Figure out how you wish to live your life...then do it.
The Dude Abides.

Just like my opinion dude.

PS
(Forgot to add....but don't be a dick about it!)

DigitalBuddha · « **Reply #4 on:** July 25, 2012, 08:46:16 PM »

Quote from: Raika on July 24, 2012, 11:39:45 PM

Hey guys, how's it going. I'm Raika, man, that's what you call me. I'm twenty-four years old, I live in Georgia, and I am transgendered. If you're thinking to yourself "oh, that must be exhausting", you're right on target, and I think that two references to The Big Lebowski in the first five sentences is enough, so I'll check it from here on out.

Living with gender identity issues is extremely stressful. Essentially, when I'm at work, in the company of family, or pretty much anywhere outside of my home or certain designated places, I have to lie about who I am. I have to dress a certain way, speak a certain way, and carry myself a certain way so that people don't get weirded out and start harassing me. Even my family, with the exception of my older sister, insist that I present myself as my biological sex rather than my perceived psychological gender. Five months ago, I was ready to deliver the ultimate "fuck it" and waste myself in the most painless way I could figure, but before I could figure what way that was, I found hope. I found Dudeism.

Living like Lebowski has helped me in so many ways. My stress extends beyond my gender identity, but because of what I've learned from the teachings of Dudeism, my life has improved beyond compare. The lingering concern of my gender identity is nagging me more now, though, than ever, and so I ask my fellow latter-day Dudes this question:

If it so happened that the Dude was, in fact, a special lady, unjustly outfitted with a pair of testicles(not to mention that righteous beard), how, then, would the Dude abide, and to that point, how can I?

Any insight on this would be greatly appreciated.

Or, to use the parlance of our times: thankie.

What do you mean by "hate the skin I'm in," dude?

revpurdy · « **Reply #5 on:** July 25, 2012, 10:15:30 PM »

What do you mean by "hate the skin I'm in," dude?
[/quote]

From what I gathered reading HE feels he has the wrong gender assignment I.E. HE at his core wants and believes he is a woman trapped in a mans body. Or possibly visa-vursa I home that did not sound offensive I do know a few people that are in the same position of feeling they're the wrong gender

revpurdy · « **Reply #6 on:** July 25, 2012, 10:17:01 PM »

Lol OK I got the quote thing back words fuckin a man well yeah

meekon5 · « **Reply #7 on:** July 26, 2012, 08:29:28 AM »

Quote from: revpurdy on July 25, 2012, 10:17:01 PM

Lol OK I got the quote thing back words fuckin a man well yeah

We all live and learn (or die trying).

Stever · « **Reply #8 on:** July 26, 2012, 03:47:39 PM »

Fuck it...why dont you just go bowling?

DigitalBuddha · « **Reply #9 on:** July 26, 2012, 06:02:29 PM »

Quote from: Stever on July 26, 2012, 03:47:39 PM

Fuck it...why dont you just go bowling?

Fuckin' eh!

rev-jaholbrook · « **Reply #10 on:** July 26, 2012, 11:02:56 PM »

All I can tell you is basically what everyone else has said. Be who you feel you need to be. It's one of those things that sometimes you have to say "Fuck it", and take any rug in the house so to speak. We all face things that make us feel like we are out of place. Not all of us do to your extremes.

PikaSonic · « **Reply #11 on:** July 29, 2012, 12:37:11 AM »

Yeah, what everyone else said. Fuckin A Man! The Dude may have been lazy and TBL called him a bum, but The Dude never felt pressured at all to change his ways. He is true to himself no matter what anyone else thought of him. That's what you should do too, man. Be whatever gender you feel you are and say fuck it to anyone who doesn't like it. Be true to yourself like The Dude and abide.

rev-jaholbrook · « **Reply #12 on:** July 29, 2012, 06:30:22 PM »

Pikasonic pretty much nailed it. Just be the person you think you should be. Hell, my wife thinks I'm retarded for becoming a dudeist but at the end of the day I'm happy with me. Do what makes you happy with you.

revpurdy · « **Reply #13 on:** July 30, 2012, 09:15:34 AM »

Quote from: jaholbrook4455 on July 29, 2012, 06:30:22 PM

Hell, my wife thinks I'm retarded for becoming a dudeist but at the end of the day I'm happy with me.

That's not right I support you as a Dudeist and I don't even know you. But your wife with that attitude is wrong in my opinion part of the vow's you both took in marriage is to love honor and respect each other no matter what. By thinking your retarded based on you choosing a religion that is open and excepting to all I don't think she is quite keeping that respect.
But that's just like you know my opinion man.

rev-jaholbrook · « **Reply #14 on:** August 03, 2012, 02:29:45 PM »

Revpurdy thanks brother. I did totally mean in a light hearted manner. She does find it silly but at the same time she knows that we don't exactly have the same religious views. I mean she isn't religious at all and up until i found this I was just experimenting with different philosophic views. This fits me and in recent weeks she has started to see it and accept it. I really do appreciate the sentiment. I will put it more like this though, and this is meant more for raika, but I grew up southern Baptist and that's what my family mostly is. If they knew I picked this instead of their beliefs it would probably be interesting to say the least. But like I said before I'm happy. I'm not hiding the fact but I'm not really advertising my beliefs either. I don't really think anyone NEEDS to know where I stand. I just abide and live.

Author Topic: How can I abide when I hate the skin I'm in? (Read 2908 times)

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