like to know japanese for 'relax man, nothing's fucked here', 'shut the fuck up, doggy'
and various other things, she's spent the last two years with a solitary japanese dude who has to give her up due to family needing him back home.


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"Dai jobu." = "I'm OK"
"Dai jobu?" = "You OK?"
It's cool, 'cause you only have to remember the one phrase
Oh, and I have no idea where the word boundaries actually are - could be "daijobu," "da-ijo bu" or anything. 

"Ino! Urusai, omae wo korosu!" should pass as "Dog! Shut up, I will kill you!"

disclaimer: I know no Japanese; I've picked up a word or two or three from friends over the years, and the All-Knowing Internets helped a little.

So long as you don't actually give the dog a swirlie, I suppose that's ok.


...


weirdo


(Jus' kidding! - Pet-related weirdness is officially All Good in my book.  I've taken to calling my cat (sigh. I hate cats) "Chunk" and making her do the Truffle Shuffle for her food )

i have no clue as to what the fuck you guys are talking about, none of it.
in my dudeness let me please state, do NOT elucidate me, i prefer to stay happy in what i already know in the world.
im sure im missing lots of great things like 'the goonies' but oh well, i abide with what i gots!

It was from a movie from the eighties, "The Goonies," starring that Sean Astin, one of The Coreys (the surviving one, I think) and a bunch of other kids, including the token Fat Kid, "Chunk," who was made to do "The Truffle Shuffle" by Corey's character.  It involved pulling up his shirt to show off his fat li'l belly and was generally demeaning to all involved.



Interesting to note that Chunk would hardly stand out as particularly heavy in today's US.

It seems a lot of people (or maybe just very vocal people) hold a dim view of him, but I swear by that Cesar Millan feller's approach.

I had a roommate who had a very lovable, and very loving, but completely uncontrollable pitbull-boxer mix.  He would let her drag him around way out in front of him when he would walk her, he would let her up on the couches, all sort of young-guy-with-his-first-dog kind of stuff.

I didn't really dig the whole bad dog thing, 'specially when I'd be the one walking her, and she'd get me in trouble with the yippy little dog owners :\  So, I took to watching that dog whisperer show, and actually ended up not reading, but downloading and listening to th' audio version of his book, and you know what?  If you put it into practice, it really works.  It's basically a matter of understanding the dog's point of view as far as the pack goes, and being really, really reallyreallyreally crazy fucking consistent.  AND patient.

But, this dog, in a matter of a couple of months, went from an insane, couch-destroying, barking-at-everything, kill-anything-she-can-catch, thinks-she's-the-Alpha crotchhound from hell to a sweet, only slightly hyperactive well-behaved (well, mostly) little angel.  Which is a good thing, because a seventy pound pitbull who doesn't acknowledge that you're the boss can be trouble.

I shit you not, at the end of our time together, I could let her out into our unfenced yard to do her bidness, and didn't have to leash her, put her on a runner, or even step outside if it were cold.  She'd go and come right back, because she knew I was in charge.  She'd wait for me to go through doors first and up stairs and everything.   

The best was her food tricks.  She'd wait until being told to eat, even though the food was right in front of her.  The drool provided an incentive to let her at it before too long;  bitch'd flood the place.
And she was the world-fuckin'-champeen of the "biscuit on the snout" thing... I could put as many as three dog cookies on her shnozz, and she'd stand there and wait until I snapped my fingers and then - no more cookies.  Honest, three, and she'd even catch 'em all.  Ok, sometimes.  It was still cute.

Fuck.  I miss mah puppay!  Fuck you, Cat!  Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani?  (What's Aramaic for "Why the fuck do I have a cat?")

What's Aramaic for "Why the fuck do I have a cat?")

Chow mein?

"chow mein" made me laugh heartily.  Thank you so much, I really needed that.

"Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani," is Aramaic for, "my lord, my lord, why have you forsaken me?" which is one of the sayings of that crazy Jesus cat on that whole cross business there.  It will probably always remain my favorite way to over-dramatize my own plight